Matters Of Dè Heart

  LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 PART 7 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 7 BIBLE REF:  Romans 12:2, Hebrews 12:1-2, 13:5-6, Ephesians 2:10, Romans 8:31-39 Because, like you, every day I feel like I have more than I can handle, I rely on God to renew my mind. His truth is my battle plan. I continue to create new trenches of truth to replace my old ruts so they will give me thought pathways leading to life and peace. * Where do you need Jesus today, right now?* Where are your thoughts falling short of His life-giving truth? Are you stuck in a negative, hurtful, and poisonous rut? What will you do? You will use the four tools God has given us to fix our thoughts and win the war in our minds:  ( 1) the Replacement Principle,  (2) the Rewire Principle,  (3) the Reframe Principle, and  (4) the Rejoice Principle.* 1. *You will remove the lie and replace it with truth.* We know we have an enemy who is seeking to destroy us. His weapon is the lie. Our weakness is...

 MARRIAGE HEALING DEVOTIONAL, SERIES 4 PART 5 TOPIC: BIBLICAL SECRETS TO A HAPPY MARRIAGE 5 BIBLE REF: Ephesians 4:26, Psalms 4:4 “ Recognize When Sleeping on it Might Be Smarter After All” We’ve all heard “Do not let the sun go down on your anger.” So late at night, when we’re tired, anxious, and emotionally drained from a contentious “discussion,” we continue to hash it out. “No, we can’t go to sleep,” we tell our spouse, “We have to resolve this!” Most of us have heard happy couples say “never go to bed mad”… but it turns out they don’t follow their own advice! In the research, when pressed on what they actually do, these wise couples admitted that when they are getting emotional and upset, they sometimes realize it is better just to go to bed. And that strengthens their relationship instead of weakening it. Why? Well, it turns out that Ephesians 4:26, is taken much out of context. Here’s the full verse: “Be angry, yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger.” It tu...

  LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 PART 5 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 5 BIBLE REF: Romans 12:1-2, Philippians 1:12-14, 20-27 You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control how you frame it. The GOAT (greatest of all time) of reframing was the apostle Paul. Paul had a strategic plan for advancing the gospel—go to Rome. If he could get to Rome and preach Jesus to the leaders there, the city could become a launchpad to spread the gospel all over the world. When Paul finally got to Rome, it was not to share Jesus with government officials. He went there as a prisoner. He was locked up under house arrest, chained to a rotating contingent of guards, awaiting a possible execution. Paul prayed for an opportunity, but it was not happening. Paul’s circumstances were out of his control. Circumstances are almost always out of our control. You’ve been where Paul was. You thought, If I just get this degree, I will get that job. You got the degree, but you did not get the job....

 MARRIAGE HEALING DEVOTIONAL, SERIES 4 PART 4 TOPIC: BIBLICAL SECRETS TO A HAPPY MARRIAGE 4 BIBLE REF: 1 Corinthians 13:3-5, Ephesians 5:33 *“ Doing the “Little Things” in LOVE Matters Big Time”* We all care deeply about our spouses. We want to “love” them well. But so much of the confusion and heartache in marriage comes because we are not making the other person FEEL cared for in the way we think we are. Or we’re even hurting them and not realizing it! Doing “all the right things” that we think should be important to the other person – in other words, insisting on loving our spouse in our own way -- really gains us nothing if it doesn’t signal love to them. And what I found in the research is that there are different little actions that deeply matter to the opposite sex – but which we tend not to know are important. If you will learn and do those little day-to-day things, it will help your spouse believe in a deep-down way that you truly care about them. For example, wives: notic...

 LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 PART 4 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 4 BIBLE REF: Philippians 4:12, Zechariah 8:13, 2Corithians 9:8, Philippians 4:19, Romans 12:2 The second tool for changing your thinking is the Rewire Principle: Rewire your brain, renew your mind.  Any trigger about money leads me to fear, thoughts of how I don’t have enough, and my need to save more to create security. When I am triggered about money, I fall into a rut—that’s the way my brain works—so I need to create a trench of truth. The good news is that the Bible speaks to all our problems. God’s Word gives us truth that empowers us to break out of the old ruts of destruction and onto a new path that leads to life . What does the Bible say that applies directly to my fears and issues about money? Here are some of my verses: I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, wheth...

  MARRIAGE HEALING DEVOTIONAL, SERIES 4, PART 3 TOPIC: BIBLICAL SECRETS TO A HAPPY MARRIAGE 3 BIBLE REF: 1Corinthians 13:7, James 2:13 “ Choose to always look for the best in your spouse’s intentions” Every day in our relationships, there will be moments when we are hurt. And that will certainly happen in the most intimate relationship of all. But when someone causes us pain, our human tendency is to ascribe a hurtful motive. They hurt me, therefore they don’t really care about me. You had the perfect romantic date planned last night, but your husband worked late and you missed your dinner reservation. You can’t wait to surprise your wife after spending all day Saturday repainting the bathroom - she’s been asking for a while now. But she is disappointed the color isn’t right. He doesn’t care. She doesn’t appreciate me. Those thoughts are so subconscious we may not even realize that’s what we’re assuming – but that is why we’re hurt. It turns out that one of the main things making p...

LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 3 BIBLE REF: Colossians 3:16, Matthew 4:4, Psalms 119:105, 119:11, 2Timothy 3:16-17 A while back I made a solemn vow that I would stop obsessing over texts and emails. I decided that anytime I heard the bing indicating I had received a message, I would not feel the urgency to check immediately. And when I did check, I would not reread and reread what the other person wrote. I would then not rewrite and rewrite my response. My digital resolution lasted … well, honestly, I don’t think I ever stopped obsessing over texts and emails. Not only did my vow not last; I didn’t even start! The problem with how we attack our problems is that we go after the problem. We focus solely on the behavior by making a commitment to start or stop doing something. You’ve done this too, right? You’ve decided, perhaps even declared, that you were going to change. ✓ This year I’m going to eat healthily and exercise every day! ✓ I’m going to sto...

 MARRIAGE HEALING DEVOTIONAL DEVOTIONAL, SERIES 4 TOPIC: BIBLICAL SECRETS TO HAPPY MARRIAGE 2 BIBLE REF: Proverbs 24:3-4, Romans 12:1-2 *“ Ask God to open your eyes to what you most need to know about your spouse ”* It is common in marriage to pray for wisdom and understanding – but when was the last time you prayed for knowledge? It turns out: we need to. In the Bible – and in the research – it is clear that it is usually not the big-ticket issues (in-laws, money, sex) that cause the problems in a marriage – or which lead to mutual delight. It is how we handle those things. It is the daily unspoken beliefs, assumptions, and practices that make the difference regardless of the big issues. The vast majority of people in our research – more than 99% -- deeply care about their mate. Even in difficult marriages! We are trying hard, but we simply don’t know some of the things that matter most to our mate. We don’t “get” some of their deepest needs. We honestly don’t recognize their hidd...

 LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 2 BIBLE REF: Matthew 4:1-11, 2Corithians 10:5, Psalms 119:9-11, Hebrews 4:12 In Matthew 4 we read about Jesus, after His baptism, heading into the desert, where He fasts for forty days and nights. At that time Satan comes to Jesus to tempt Him. Because he knew Jesus had to be hungry, Satan told Him to turn stones into bread. Just as he did with Adam and Eve, Satan was trying to get Jesus to do something that wasn’t part of God’s plan for His life. (That’s also what Satan does with you.) Jesus replied, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God’” (Matthew 4:4 NIV), quoting Deuteronomy 8:3. Satan realized his first plan failed, so he attacked Jesus from a different angle. (That is also exactly what Satan does with you.) Same method, new try. The devil took Jesus to the highest point of the temple in Jerusalem and dared Him to throw Himself off. Satan decided...

  MARRIAGE HEALING DEVOTIONAL, SERIES 4 TOPIC : BIBLICAL SECRETS TO A HAPPY MARRIAGE 1 BIBLE REF: Psalms 31:24, Proverbs 13:12, Hebrews 11:1-6 “ Let your heart have an unshakeable hope for your marriage” Without a doubt, the dream of a happy marriage is one of the most consistent longings of the human heart. Forget the bleak statistics we’ve seen, forget the bad rap that committed, lifelong marriage gets in the media – we want to marry our best friend, then enjoy our spouse and enjoy being married. And many people do! So what makes the difference? The bible has so many vital words of life, so many practical answers for building a rich, abundant, lifelong marriage. And it is awe-inspiring to see that social research findings “reveal” what the Bible has said all along. In all my research with thousands of men and women, there is one bottom-line common denominator among marriages that survive versus those that fail: hope . The feeling that we can and will make it. This is the courage ...

 LIFE MATTERS DISCUSS, SERIES 7 TOPIC: WINNING THE WAR IN YOUR MIND 1 BIBLE REF: Philippians 4:8-9, Proverbs 23:7, Romans 12:1-2, 2Corithians 10:3-5 Our lives are always moving in the direction of our strongest thoughts. What we think shapes who we are. You might read that and think I’m being an overly dramatic preacher using hyperbole to get your attention. But this is no exaggeration. Our lives do follow the direction of our thoughts. The better we grasp that truth, the better equipped we’ll be to change the trajectory of our lives. But don’t take my word for it. Both the Bible and modern science provide evidence that this is true. So throughout this Bible Plan, we’ll unpack both Scripture and what we’ve learned from scientific research. Here’s a brief example of both: In Philippians 4:8–9, the apostle Paul writes, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is exce...

RELATIONSHIP IS NOT A PRISON The bitter truth be told, lots of young people are in what I call prison, not relationships. They are not happy in the relationship they find themselves in but are afraid to leave also. Their relationship does not give them the freedom they need. They are in the relationship to please the one they are with or make them happy against their own will. There are lots of proposals that deserve the answer NO, but one was afraid to say it because of the fear that the guy might get angry with her so they rather go with a YES and pretend all is well. Such people don't understand the importance of freedom. If they did they would realize that saying NO might make him angry but that will make her feel free in spirit and mind. Your freedom is more important than his anger. You know he is married, engaged to someone else, but still wants you which you are not happy with. Don't sacrifice your happiness for his. When you do that, it equals to killing yourself to gi...